My Leave
The leave,
The surrender to the need
to leave.
But at the same time
return
to embrace what has left me.
And, to find what I forgot
I had.
I feel uninspired with what to write. Not uninspired...maybe more...vapid, insipid. My mind isn't racing with the need to purge anything.
My mind is more thoughtful and content to graciously ponder the mysteries of life. My leave from work has definitely given me the time and space to just BE. Just be. With little obligation and distraction. I have taken the time to get to know the innate wisdom that I have ignored for far to long. And that, I have found just by listening. Quietly. And actually hearing what is being said. Hearing with my entire being, not just my ego, which always places judgment and compares. No. I want to listen with all six of my senses. I want to listen to the girl in me who still loves faeries and mermaids. To my old soul which knows things I cannot fathom, yet I feel as deeply seeded peace. To the intelligent woman in me who tries to figure it all out, who has the courage to encounter that which pains her. To my higher power who carries the wisdom to understand the need to surrender to the mysteries of life. To my esoteric self who can embrace the paradox of encountering at the same time as surrendering. I want to be s-i-l-e-n-t so i can l-i-s-t-e-n to all of it. (See the anagram?)
I am practicing listening with my heart. In the words of Carl Jung "Your vision will be clear when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens."
And another quote - a tribute to the season that is taking forever to awaken:
"The buds swell imperceptibly without hurry or confusion, as if the short spring day were an eternity." ~Henry David Thoreau
Oh, p.s. Can I tell you a secret? The part of me that is listening to my affinity towards the magical, has started to act a little strange. The world of faeries, devas, and sprites has allured me long enough, and lately I have found myself responding. I have started to hug trees. I mean, really hugging them. Full body, eyes closed, tightly squeezing, extra long hugs. It's to the point where I don't even check for potential witnesses - I just hug. The best trees are the ones you can reach your arms right around. Seriously. Try it. Then comment on my blog and let me know if you liked it. Let me know if you felt the tree sprites.
posted by ...from the leopard print chaise @ 5:53 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
To your brave soul that is, thank you (maraming salamat). I too listen to the trees. They have helped me when running long distance or when walking alone. I have to say I hesitate to hug? What stops me? yes at what will people say. Oh well, I will start gently and touch the tress. Your writing inspired me to remember that what is just is. Not good, not bad. It is the story within me that puts lables on my expereince. I hope to reflect more inward to understand my story as only a story. I hope to see nature, life and me in it just be.
Sandy, you are very inspirational. The trees love it and so do you.
J
I am so glad that you have found time to connect with it all. i will try the tree hugging ! A
My new dear friend,
I have never blogged before so bare with me Sandy.
I want to tell you how grateful I am to have met you, there is so much I want to say and know that I will as time goes on. There is comfort in knowing it is not just me. Reading your words brings me to tears on so many levels, I understand what you are writing even though it may seem like your words do not make sense at times, the feelings you are carrying when you write, the tears that fall because words just do not do your feelings justice and you wish you could express the emotion you feel.
Thank you Sandy for our paths crossing.
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