5 Nights of Sensory Deprivation

I have spent the last week at a yoga and meditation retreat in California. I am home safe and sound and processing the "transformation of consciousness" that being silent and meditating for 5 days can bring. I wasn't sure what to expect, but it turns out the retreat was more monastery and less spa. These were the rules to be abided by:

No talking, writing or reading
No mind altering substances (not like I do a lot of that but the occasional beer on vacation is nice)
No scented bath/personal products (gasp!)
No meat (more importantly, no easy access to cheese - double gasp!)
No caffeine (triple gasp!)

I felt like a fish out of water for a solid 24 hours, considering the only trips I have been on in the last 5 years have been related to biking, training or racing, which definately include every indulgence on the list above. I really didn't know what to do with myself…until they gave us our "hectic" schedule. Our (silent)days started at 5:45 with a 45 minute sitting meditation, followed by breakfast,a walking meditation, more sitting meditation, yoga meditation, lunch, walking, sitting, yoga, walking, sitting, dinner….you get the idea.

The silence, I loved. No one could ask, "why are you here?" or "tell us about yourself." There was no intrusiveness or feeling obliged to pretend you are someone you aren't for the sake of social graces. The week was all about introspection.

Meal times provided the most sensory stimulation of the day: sights, sounds, tastes, smells. Food has never tasted better. Every bite was like an explosion of flavors and textures.

I developed my own style of walking meditation, which consisted of long hikes in the hills around the center. As the week went on, I felt my energy levels rising. On my last walking "meditation," I vigorously hiked to the top of the "mountain" behind the center, occasionally running and lunging, humming a line from a Waif's song that goes "I wanna climb to the top of the hills just to see what lies beyond." More importantly than following true "walking meditation" style, I found that spark of energy within myself and realized how much I missed that part of my soul.

Over the last day and a half, the staff at Spiritrock really prepared us for our release back into the real world. They spoke to us about how we may feel emotional, or hypersensitive to the sights and sounds of the outside world. Well, once I got to the airport I went crazy, but not in the way I was imagining I would re-integrate. I actually went on an indulgence binge. I promptly ordered a cheeseburger and fries. Then made my way to a bookstore where I read as many things as I could handle (which was actually a little difficult). Then off to a pub for a beer, followed by more reading, writing in my journal and a shot of espresso. For dessert, chocolate caramels from a candy store. And for non-veggie dinner # 2, sushi. All the way home I read until my heart was content. I came across a passage in my newly purchased book, which I found quite relevant.
"She did not listen; or she listened but to something else, to something inside her. It was sound without melody - like dream music, remembered for its effect but not for its harmonic distresses and recoveries." (Wicked by Gregory Maguire).